and then she felt old

I am so not old. The fact that I feel old is ridiculous. I shall keep telling myself this.

But there was something strange about being amongst the oldest kids at my high school today. There is something incredibly weird about having all these underclassmen below you, because you know that eventually they're just going to replace you the same way you replaced the ones who came before you. I've been thinking a lot about this, and about change, and wondering what exactly this next year will bring. Always, I want my heart to be focused in the right place. I'm still figuring out ways to do this daily and to maintain my quiet times in a way that is real. Constantly, I have to fight against the feelings of stress and giving into the way the world wants me to think. I have been caught in that trap far too frequently lately and I'm not willing to stay there. I refuse to be depressed or to believe there is only one way. I definitely refuse to believe that this year has to be full of stress. It's a daily struggle and an insistent reminder that I need to "Die, Sucker." and just trust God to work out the details.

Summer is still fresh on my mind. It's hard to accept this new season. I might be writing daily for a while, but mostly about life. Take it as you will. I need to capture this time and sometimes it's nice to know that someone is listening.